Horror

Dark Ride – After Dark Horror Fest – 8 Films To Die For

Dark Ride – After Dark Horror Fest – 8 Films To Die For

Nearly a decade after two young girls are brutally murdered, the monstrous killer, Jonah, escapes from a mental institution and returns to his familiar killing ground, the theme park attraction "Dark Ride." His unfortunate victims this time are a group of college kids on a road trip that inevitably leads them to the Dark Ride where their night of youthful fun becomes a nightmare. The killer, who is mimicking the sets within the attraction, makes sure this is a "ride" audiences will never forget.

Why you would want to spend the night in an amusement park is beyond me, but that’s the story we’re given. A group of teens go on a road trip and as part of their excitement decide to spend the night in an amusement park where two young girls were murdered years ago.

Despite the rather odd nature of the set up we have plenty of opportunities for scares because of the odd lighting, crazy props and things jumping out during the ride.

We also have another clichéd part of the horror genre, while making their way to the Dark Ride they pick up a hitchhiker. A young woman with an overactive imagination and some “people” issues. Her little rant in the van when she first gets in is classic in its insanity.

So after introducing the “unknown element” it’s off to the Dark Ride and the scene of the crime. Of course there is someone else there and everyone’s lives are now in danger as the madman Jonah sets his sights on some new victims. In a wild and completely unexplained rampage he begins to dispatch the teens one by one. Again, the ride makes a good setting with all of its flashing lights and “jumping” props.

But just because there is trouble all around that doesn’t mean we can sneak in a sex scene and a chance to show off the hitchhikers tits (even though they are pretty nice). Nothing like taking time out to get a blow job while you’re friends are being dispatched in the other room. Of course this one ends in a pretty gruesome manner.

This movie starts off well and although a bizarre and rather senseless plot it could work. But the movie gets silly and cliché and it’s basically Friday the 13th in an amusement park.

But the real problem is there is no point to this movie. In the end when everything is revealed – the killer has his soliloquy you have no idea why any of this happened. All of this was just because he was a madman?

I wasn’t all that impressed by the end of the movie thinking the writers had run out of ideas and went with the old standby. There isn’t anything new in this movie, the gore is pretty minimal and there are some amusing bits.

It’s worth renting since it’s part of the series, but it could have been a lot better.

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Time to bring out the scary movies

Ah, October, my favorite month. The colors of fall, the cooler temperatures, the scary pumpkins, the great decorations, and of course the scary movies that proliferate the shelves of the video stores.

And it’s at this time I switch over and start watching the darker films, so for the rest of the month it’ll a listing of good and the bad of the horror/thriller/suspense genre. I’ve got a whole slew of movies lined up to watch. Some are old favorites and some are first time views.

Just so you know, slasher films really aren’t my thing. I liked the first Halloween movie, but skipped on the rest. Friday the 13th, Nightmare on Elm Street and all of those got a big pass from me. Now, before you think I’m a big pussy and watch X-Files with the lights on, I like the Saw series and plenty of other gory movies. Its just that I want there to be a point to all the hacking and slashing. Chasing some naked chick around the place with a chainsaw or machete is fine as long as there is a point to doing it. But if you’re just showing some titty so you can get an R-Rating for your lame ass movie so people think there is something more to it than there really is, then it’s a waste of my time. I have the Internet I can see boobies whenever I want.

So with that we will travel together and check out some creepy movies this month and see which are the keepers and which will get sold off as used before the end of the year.

Nothing like watching scary movies in the basement by yourself at midnight… :)

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